Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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