who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
