ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
