when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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