She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
