he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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