I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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