Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
organizing the empties. That sober.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
