Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
