So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
