On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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