So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I am naked and annoyed.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
