wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
