I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
