so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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