Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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