I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
