Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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