big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
