Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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