Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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