Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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