girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
