summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
