Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Randomize
