No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
