Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
