It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
