i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
