That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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