fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize
