The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
