oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
