If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
