Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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