Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
