This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
She announced her abortion via fbk
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
