My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
