East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
