Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
