He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
