Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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