hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize