Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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