Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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