so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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