We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
