He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Randomize
