it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
