I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
